TRUANCY — Part 2

So, the court date, for Taigyn and I, was set for the 14th of October for Taigyn’s ‘truancy from school’. But, before I tell you about the lovely conversation I had today, let me tune you in on what and why…

It’s been so long since the beginning of this started, I don’t remember all the nitty gritty details, so I’ll just sum it up for you.

My son missed almost 30 days of school last year.  But before you gasp, shake your head and judge, wondering how and why I would let this happen, please read the reasoning for this.

It was, I believe, right after Winter Vacation in January of ’11, a boy at school was upset with my son trying to say that he was ‘getting with his girlfriend’…..blah, blah…teenage drama. Taigyn had told the girl that if she was with someone, he was not going to get involved, but the other boy was beyond the ‘listening phase’ and just wanted to fight.  That boy came to our house and, low and behold, they fought outside in the street.

-NOOO…I was NOT at the house at the time.

-NOOO…Taigyn has NEVER been in trouble at school for fighting or been in trouble for ANYTHING for that matter; at school or at home.

Although, with the kid and some of his friends at school still irritating Taigyn, I made him PROMISE (again and again) that he would not fight.  I will not have anyone look down on my boy because other kids can not control themselves.  Anyway, a couple months went by when another boy, who is coincidentally friends with that first kid, wanted to fight Taigyn. I’m guessing that the first kid couldn’t do any damage to Taigyn, so they conjoured up a bigger boy to do it. (Mind you that both these boys are older than my son.)

Taigyn came home from school begging me to, please, let him fight him, but I respectfully declined.  Fighting? Why?  What exactly would that solve?  That you CAN beat them?? And then what?  They get a bigger boy?? They can’t beat you with their hands so they start bringing in weapons? Okay, okay…I may read too many stories.  Hear too many things that happen, but…I’m a Momma and those are the questions going through my head…

I happen to go outside to get something out of the car when my husbands daughter comes out of the house and tells me that he’s here.  I look up in the court at the end of our street and see 4 carloads…YESS…I said 4 carloads of kids just waiting for Taigyn to come outside!  Are you freakin’ serious????  At first I was appalled, then angry, then questioned if they thought it would take 4 carloads of people to beat up Taigyn…since only one couldn’t do it.

Anyway….talked to police man, the SRO at school, etc, etc…went to court, got a restraining order from him or any of his friends coming into our neighborhood, removed my son from school because they couldn’t promise any protection.  Taigyn was too happy about this, but it was my decision, not his. We waited for two weeks to hear an answer and, lo and behold, his transfer was denied.

That was two weeks that he missed from school.  10 days.

In Nov, I believe, Taigyn underwent surgery having his tonsils and sinuses removed.  He had two doctors appointments before coming to the decision to undergo surgery and one appointment after his surgery to make sure all was well.

That was two weeks that he missed from school for recovery and 3 more days concerning this surgery. 13 days.

He had missed 4 days of school that we ended up having to take him to the doctor for.  One time missing two days in a row and another time, two days in a row.  All excused from his doctor.  

So, to sum it up, 10 days were missed because I pulled him out, as advised by the head of the school board herself.  13 days for his surgery and appointments leading up to and one after.  Which leaves us with him missing 7 days of school, 4 of which are excused.

So, of course, we had a court date which we attended and we just had to talk to the board about what had happened, then we went back to court and sat with about 100 others families to hear a speech about the importance of school and then we had to wait for a letter for our own individual court date.  Mind you, that it was now April and as soon as Taigyn’s transfer was denied, I enrolled in him in home schooling.  

By the end of May, I still haven’t recieved a court date and was concerned that his would come up while he was visiting his dad in the summer, which would’ve been WAY too much driving. So, I called the court house and we finally had our court date set.  October 14th.  When the date was made, I didn’t realize that it would fall on the children’s Fall Vacation of their next school year.  So, we just planned our family vacation (and our trip to IL) around it.  

Two days before the court date and the day we planned on leaving for vacation, I received a letter in the mail telling me that they changed the court date to the next week. I immediately got on the phone leaving messages for the truancy officer to tell her that we were going to be out of state that day and that we needed to reschedule it.  Thursday, no call back. Friday, no call back.  I left another message with my cell number and did not hear from her the entire vacation.  Yesterday (Monday) morning came around and when there was still no call back, I called again. This time leaving messages, not only for Taigyn’s truancy officer, but the receptionist, also, directed me to two other officers, whom I left messages for. By the afternoon, I called back and the receptionist put me through to the supervisor and after a couple calls, I finally got a hold of her.  She said that she would have our truancy officer call me back.

Today, I get a call from the irritated and annoyed officer. I explained my story again, probably for the hundredth time.  Of course, the first thing she asked or ‘accused’ me of was…

‘So what you’re telling me, is that you DID NOT send your child to school on the 21st?’  

‘Ummm….no. He doesn’t go to school.’

‘What does he do????!!!’

‘I pulled my son out of school last year because….’  and I filled her in, again, of what had happened.  

We will change the court date for you and your son for the December 9th.  But, I’m telling you that you have to be there because we will change this court date ONLY ONCE!’

‘Wellll, you’ve already changed the court date once, so…..’

She didn’t respond.  

So , now, we have a court date for December, for a truancy that happened last school year, in a school that he doesn’t even go to anymore.  One of the ladies that we spoke to on the first court date, told us that it will probably be thrown out, but if not, I could serve 10 days for each day that my child was absent from school.  *Sigh*  Fun, fun, eh…

Don’t get me wrong. I DO understand the importance of school.  But, I have to say, that I care more about my childs health!  

…*Please refer to Dear Miss Truancy Lady

If my son (or any of my children for that matter) is sick, I WILL keep him home. If he is seriously ill, I WILL take him to the doctor. And, if my son is threatened in any way (even if he doesn’t believe he is), I will remove him from the situation.

Another thing that I should add to this, is the ‘no guarantee’ for my son’s safety at school.  I told the SRO, principal and vice principal that THEY are responsible for the safety of my child.  From the time he gets on the bus till the time he gets off the bus after school, I am leaving him in their hands.  Can You Promise The Safety Of My Son At Your School??  This was their reply….

The first couple times, the kids might get away with fighting, but by the third time, they usually get cocky and they end up getting caught.  The teachers are usually standing outside the classrooms during class exchanges, so if a fight starts, we can usually break it up within the first 30 seconds. Although, if the kids are in the bathroom, we don’t usually get to them as quick.’

GASPPPPPPPPPPP!!!   Really??!!  Well, thanks for the assurance and my child WILL NOT be coming back to your school.

What parent in their right mind wouldn’t do the same??!!  There were a number of kids threatening him and shoving him the hallway.  Do you know how HARD it was for me to tell him NOT to shove them back??  Too back down and not just kick their arse??!!   I know it took a few days for him NOT to be upset with me for that and for taking him out of school.  But I still stand firm in my decision.  I think it was the right thing to do. And, because of that decision, Taigyn still has not ever gotten into any trouble. He is getting a 93% in school.  He works 4 days a week.  And I continue to hear good things about, not only him, but about the rest of MY children.  How polite they are. How respectful they are. What good kids they are…..from people whom I don’t know to the neighbors whom I barely know.

It brings tears to my eyes knowing what great children that I have raised. Love you guys!!  xxoo

 

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